We gather here to mourn the passing of Jared Johnson, a man who lived his life to the fullest, or at least attempted to do so. Born on May 15, 1970, he entered this world with a bang, and fittingly, left it with a few questionable life choices and a loud scream on August 11, 2023.

Jared, a proud resident of Jackson, Tennessee, was known for his incredible ability to find humor in the most mundane situations. Whether it was slipping on a banana peel (seriously, who does that?), or mistaking a dog for a cat (in his defense, it was a very convincing costume), Jared had a knack for making us laugh until our sides hurt.

He was the family's designated jokester, always armed with a pun, and ready to deliver a punchline at any given moment. No family gathering was complete without Jared's witty remarks and bewildering antics. You could always count on him to wear mismatched socks or show up dressed as a rogue pirate or a disco roller-skating enthusiast.

Jared's creative spirit extended beyond his sense of humor. He was an accomplished inventor, with an impressive collection of failed contraptions gathering dust in his garage. From a self-watering plant that ended up flooding his entire living room to a voice-activated remote control that only responded to his dog's commands, Jared's inventions were certainly memorable, if not always functional.

If there was one thing Jared loved more than laughter and questionable inventions, it was food. He had an insatiable appetite for anything edible, but his go-to guilty pleasure was quite unusual - peanut butter and sauerkraut sandwiches. Don't knock it until you've tried it, they say. Actually, scratch that, please don't try it.

In his free time, Jared enjoyed exploring the great outdoors, or as he called it, "nature's playground." His hiking trips were legendary, often involving interpretive dance routines in the middle of the forest and impromptu bird-call competitions (which he usually lost). Let's just say his interaction with wildlife was as memorable for him as it was for the animals.

Jared Johnson was a man who valued laughter, creativity, and finding joy in the simple things. His unique spirit will be missed, but never forgotten. May his memory live on through the countless stories, laughter, and peanut butter-sauerkraut sandwich recipes shared by those lucky enough to have known him.

Rest in peace, Jared. We hope wherever you are, there are plenty of banana peels and mismatched socks to keep you entertained.