Nigel Thrummery, 131, of Fingringhoe, England, passed on April 01, 2021. Nigel was born on March 12, 1890.

 Nigel Tarquinesque Thrummeryhas died of nefarious ankles at the age of 121. He was famous for his witty prose, which effervesced with elements of lyricism and nutmeg, giving way to subtle undertones of bathos and orchard fruits.

Born in Fingringhoe, England, Thrummery\'s upbringing was conventional for the time, with overwhelming aromas of fragrant honeysuckle giving way to the delicate permeation of a fourth-grader’s hamster cage. He left school at 6, and started writing for the local newspaper, the Fingringhoe Aggravator.

Beginning with local news reporting, Thrummery began reviewing restaurants for the publication when its long-standing food writer Angus Strop-cnut was accidentally executed by a Belgian firing squad for Waffling. Thrummery later described the opportunity as “a stroke of luck, with tempting notes of elderflower and a chalky aftertaste.”

His restaurant reviews became more and more popular with the Aggravator’s readership, and in 1925 he was offered a chief writer position at the national wine publication, Vinyard Infiltrator.

Over the years, he wrote wine reviews for a number of newspapers and magazines, including the Guardian, Glug Glug Spit Fortnightly, Oenalysis, and Grapefelch. His writing style was full-bodied, with hints of sherbet and iodine, like a peaty hospital dessert.

In 1988, Nigle achieved national notoriety in the UK when, having imbibed slightly more than usual at a gala tasting event, he attempted to decant and drink Princess Michael of Kent. She described the experience as “unpleasant for the most part, but giving way to surprising aspects of licorice and brambles.” Thrummery was freed when she declined to press charges.

Away from the wine world, Nigel had many hobbies, including amateur necromancy and mail fraud. He married his first wife, Blair, in 1965, but they divorced six years later, citing a relationship that was “cold and unfeeling, with a short finish and inexplicably light tannins.”

Sheldon Weldon, wine writer, born March 12, 1890, died April 1, 2021. The funeral will be on Friday at the car park, BYOB